Then and now.
This morning I sit and drink my coffee and think about my apartment in Toronto. I reminisce, taking a virtual tour in my mind, from the front door, through the little living room with its floor-to-ceiling grey brick, wood-burning, corner fireplace and the IKEA bookcase with the square shelves I bought with the money my dad gave me to help me get set up in the new place.
I go through the kitchen, where we had a great little countertop table with stools to sit at, and my mom’s antique desk under the pass-through to keep mail and candles on. There was a lamp on that table, which I loved. I’ve always liked a lamp on in the kitchen, and that lamp was shining the first time Graham hugged me and told me he loved me.
Down the hallway past the bathroom into my bedroom, where I had my queen-sized bed, a real, grown-up bed that I bought for myself to replace that old futon during that one month I made good money working downtown at a job I hated.
Out the back through my roommate’s bedroom, through the sliding doors onto the deck, out to that little space I loved, where I grew lettuce and tomatoes and herbs in a tiny raised bed I had created where once there had been a small patch of grass.
I stand with my coffee and look out the window of the house I live in now, marveling at the size of our yard, the immensity of the vegetable garden I keep, the expanse of green grass that hopefully, someday will make an awesome back yard for kids to roll around and play on, big enough for a swing set and sand box.
All the while my husband sleeps upstairs, a good man who works hard and loves me every day, tells me I’m his favourite person in the world, and although the past is pretty in retrospect, today is every bit as beautiful in its own way.
It is amazing, isn’t it, the choices we make and happy accidents we have that lead us to the lives we live today…I look back on my first apartment, and where I am now, and I still feel like I’m playing grownup.
manager mom’s last blog post..Mobile Phone Mothering
Wow this is a wonderful post! Seems to me that you are a very grateful person for what you have now and what you’ve had in the past. You speak so wonderfully of your husband. Don’t tell your Mom or Graham that I said this but are you nesting? I was thinking about how you moved your office and it dawned on me that you may have been making way for a nursery. Please don’t hate me for this comment and you can delete it if you want, but it’s just a feeling I have. I hope you are. Hugs!
Traceytreasure’s last blog post..Rise Today
Lovely – and I am so impressed by your gardening prowess. If we manage to get some of ours planting to turn out, it will be through none of our work, I’ll tell you. We are lazy/busy/forgetful and if it’s not seen, it doesn’t get done.
(And it was nice to see you again, too! I get shyer with those group meetings, so I felt like we hadn’t talked much before, so I was happy to see you with less going on.)
kittenpie’s last blog post..Gone
I think sometimes we look back on the past with rose colored glasses. But who really wants to go back to big poof 80’s hair, or platform shoes for men…?
Catherine, the redhead blogger
A Week In The Life of A Redhead’s last blog post..REDUNDANT MOM QUESTIONS
A lovely post Amy.
A good mattress was my first real furniture purchase too. Smart move.
metro mama’s last blog post..Imagine All The People
Sniff.
I have been thinking of my past apartments, too, because even though we own the place, we’re essentially moving into an apartment again. I’m actually rather anxious to explore that feeling again, after a few years occupying a full house.
I love the things you recall, like the light being on when Graham told him he loved you. Those little details are so illuminating (no pun intended).
NotSoSage’s last blog post..Alter Ego Follow Up
You are a lucky woman Amy.
Don Mills Diva’s last blog post..Driving with the brakes on
Ahhh…
Rebecca’s last blog post..Jamie and Jeffrey?
Why did this make me cry. Gawd I’m a baby. Damn you can write.
motherbumper’s last blog post..some nerve
yeah, it got me, too. lovely.
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