This morning was rough. Nate was up several times between the hours of 2 and 8 to feed and grunt and struggle to poop. If anyone had told me how important poop and boobs would become in the months following the birth of our little baby, I’d have told her she was nuts.
We had caught up a little wee bit on some sleep in the living room, Nate in the pack ‘n play and me on the couch until Mr. Squirmy started to squirm. I got up, gave him the pacifier that had fallen or been spat out of his mouth, and snuggled back into the couch, praying he’d settle for just one more half hour. My prayers weren’t answered, so I got up again to see what was making the baby wiggle.
He was soaking wet on one side. Time to get up.
I changed Nate’s diaper and put him in some fresh jammies and he lay on the change pad happily where it was on the floor in front of his mirrored closet doors. I grabbed the boppie pillow and put my head down on it beside him on the floor. (That’s right, we don’t have a change table yet, so the change pad was on the floor.)
He sighed. He cooed. He wiggled happily.
My fatigue-riddled brain swam with all kinds of thoughts.
Why does it seem like such a struggle for this little guy to poop? Is it the antibiotics I’m taking? Should I keep taking them? Is it something I’m eating?
Are those little red spots on Nate’s skin itching him?
Is Graham enjoying all of the uninterrupted sleep he’s getting this morning?
How will I survive this day on three hours of sleep?
We should get out today. Except it’s minus 25 with the windchill.
Why didn’t I think to set the coffee to brew automatically?
Do I leave Nate here while I go pee? Will the cats eat him if I do?
How can my boobs be leaking already?
What was it like to go to bed at 11 at night and wake up at 7 the next morning? I completely forget.
My eyes welled up with tired tears as I looked over at my little guy, this little person who truly lives moment-to-moment, completely oblivious to the challenges he brings us. And I decided not to let myself go there.
This is just one day in a series of many.
And the coffee is working wonders.
What a sweet wonderful post. My son is 8 days old; I can completely relate to your emotions right now. You truly captured what it’s like have a baby in your life.
The picture is absolutely precious.
I don't have babies, but I am so glad you're letting us all in on the thoughts that come swirling around when you're sleep deprived. Nate is adorable, and I hear it gets easier.
It will get better and easier I promise. It takes awhile to adjust to their routine but it happens over time. Remember I was just in that place and I'm here whenever you need to talk.
It gets easier. The lack of sleep, you kind of get used to, for a few months. Then you really start to need sleep again, and hopefully Nate will start sleeping through the night, and you as well.
Um, as for the pooping, it could be any of what you are eating. I had to avoid caffeine, onions, garlic, cauliflower, broccoli, citrus of any kind, and a bunch of stuff I already can't remember, because it made Eric gassy when he was little. I slowly re-introduced everything, after being extremely limited in what I could eat, and if he reacted to something, then I waited another few weeks. Oh, dairy was a big one. Yogurt, cheese, milk, any tiny bit of dairy made him constipated and gassy.
As much as it sucks, it might be worth a shot to avoid a few things and see what happens.
Good luck. It gets so much better.
Hi Amy, I occasionally catch up with you here…congratulations on the birth of your son! He is adorable! Things do get easier…we have 3 girls now! I have a change table that you can have if you want it…it is a darker wood and might save your back! Just send me an email to let me know and we can arrange to get it to you.
breastfed babys dont always poop every day. And when they do release one of those multiple-day poops – take cover! LOL. I'm lucky that my guy tends to be fairly regular, but my mom likes to tell me how i would wait 8 days, to the point where my belly looked pregnant, and then i would just erupt. (pretty picture, i'm sure) LOL.
Anyway – I have heard that a q-tip dipped in vaseline, or taking the baby's temperature (ahem, the *hard* way) can help get things moving if he's backed up and its bothering him.
And dont boppy pillows make the best pillows? I'm totally recovering mine to match my comforter once this kid is old enough not to need it anymore.
Hey there – I've been reading your blog for a few months, and have really been enjoying the news on your baby! I'm expecting my first in April (omgterrified/excited). Just think – by the time I'm struggling with 3-hour nights and poop-or-not-to-poops, your little one will be just about snoozing through the night. Hang in there – it sure sounds like you're coping just fine.
Hang in there, Mama. KayTar has long struggled with chronic constipation, so if you ever need to talk about poop or the lack thereof, you know where to find me.
You'll be okay…I promise – and, the next thing you know, you'll be telling us about him walking.
You will make it through this – I promise. I remember what it's like to go through this time…and it feels never-ending. It will get easier, that I promise you.
And I'm with the earlier commentor in that not all breastfed babies poop every day. My youngest would sometimes go three or four days between poops. This is normal! The only time you need to be concerned is if he seems constipated when he does go. If not, then don't worry about it. My sister claims that one of her breastfed children went TEN days without a bowel movement once. Some babies just seem to use everything up. If he were in discomfort, he'd definitely let you know.
Hang in there. *hugs*
Amy, it sounds like you're holding it all together pretty well — and the sleep deprivation surely is no fun at all, but you're managing to be philosophical about it. I'm so impressed!
Ah baby poop. I remember when my whole world revolved around baby poop … Good times!
"And I decided not to let myself go there."
Woman. Thou art wise. Write that down on every wall in your home and say it over and over because it's the thing that gets you through. Your CHOICE not to let yourself go there.
Also? Belated CONGRATULATIONS ON THE SNUGGLEBUNNY.
poop and boobs – that sounds about right! I love these words and your questions/thoughts.
Habbala, this was just the tip of the iceburg! Glad you're enjoying reading them, anyway.
Jen, I have thought of you on many occasions and knowing how things are now with you and Chase reminds me that it WILL get easier!
Yeah, I've been doing some research and from what I understand, food allergies are actually pretty rare, but I have absolutely thought of this possibility, too. Thanks!
OMG, 8 days! I wouldn't want to be near that little bum when the "eruption" took place…
It's not that Nate is constipated…it's just that he gets crampy. I'll be mentioning it to our doctor when he goes on Tuesday.
Boppies are AWESOME.
Hi, SaltwaterMom, thanks for leaving a comment (after a few months!). Hope you're feeling okay, what with a little one on the way yourself.
Oh yeah, there seems to be no shortage of women with whom I can now discuss the fascinating world of infant POO. heh
And then I'll be lamenting the speed at which he's growing! It's all so bittersweet.
You know what, Momma Sunshine? I wake up most mornings just proud that we got through another day and another night and marvel at how quickly time is passing.
My mom reminded me that as long as everything's going in and everything's coming out, not to worry. He doesn't seem constipated, just "grunty". Thanks for your kind words of reassurance!
Thanks, mimi! It's really amazing how our bodies can adapt to different rhythms of sleep, isn't it? I really do love being Nate's mom. Meeting his needs is fulfilling, even if my own are being sacrificed at the moment!
Kelly, I think maybe I should get a stack of post-it notes and place them strategically around the house, with "Don't go there!" written on them.
And thanks for your congratulations!
Do you watch Scrubs, kat? There was one episode when the Janitor is pretending to be German or something and he says to J.D., "Why is your Lake Tittikaka not filled with poop and boobs?" I think of that on a daily basis and laugh. It's werid, the little things that get you through!
Those feeling sound very familiar. What tends to happen is that rather than getting more sleep, you get better at dealing with the lack of it. And then after a while you look back and realise that you've hit a milestone, and that things are getting easier, or just seeming too.
It's hard work, but so worth it.
And no, the cats won't eat him. The same cannot be said about dogs however. That's the one thing the tabloids have taught me – don't leave kids and dogs alone.
The "not constipated but grunty" thing sounds very familiar. Katie's pediatrician told me she just didn't know the right muscles to coordinate to make it go right, so she'd grunt and strain and wiggle and manage by accident (frequently when sneezing). And that she'd figure it out and it'd get better.
Reading all the comments about no-poop breastfed babies? ohmigod. Her diapers are soo full after just an extra long nap, I can't imagine an 8 day load.. augh!
It’s funny where lack of sleep can take your thoughts. I think it would be much harder if I hadn’t been through this phase once already with a somewhat colicky baby (my Nate). When I’m about to break down I just think of how much easier she is and how fast these last 6 weeks have already gone by. Whatever works for you, stick with it.
Oh and sometimes I “accidently” bump my hubby in the night because I’m jealous of his sleep! Ha!